hey ya'll...
usually i try to make my blog posts profound, meaningful, and insightful, a clever mixture of real-life situations i'm experiencing and deeper thoughts i'm having about the ever-present eternal reality of the Gospel. usually i deceive myself in my cleverness, and the purity of what started out to be a grace-prompted revelation often gets corrupted through my desire to dress it up in pretty language in order to impress my readers.
i hope this post is different (and shorter, as you're probably hoping:). perhaps a little more like a brief mass-email update. over the past couple weeks, life has continued as it normally does: nonstop teaching and preparation during the week, intermingled with a few welcomed breaks, and a "cool-down, relax, get laundry done and clean the apartment" weekend filled with a variety of social and church events.
as this latin rhythm follows its normal course, so does the swing of my daily life. some days (like yesterday for example) are great. i feel wonderful: time spent with God and people is meaningful, I do things well, I get things accomplished, and maybe toss in a few good selfless deeds (like making my roommate a sandwich or witnessing to somebody about Jesus).
and of course, there are moments with my rhythm gets thrown off and i misstep, causing others to wonder what the heck is wrong with me. i start dancing my own steps, to the beat of the desire of self, and eventually trip up and land on my bum, stupidly looking around in the hope that nobody noticed, especially the band leader. of course, he always does.
but the rhythm of grace never alters. never slowing to match my weakness, nor accelerating beyond the strength given me. my performance has no effect on its continuity. the best days don't surpass my need for it, nor do my worst days exhaust its supply.
asi es nuestro Dios, lleno de gracia.
Monday, February 18, 2008
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
the real and the VERY real
rrgh.
That frustrated little grumble pretty much sums up my day. I started Tuesday, February 5th slightly irked at my inability to accomplish very much this weekend, even though it was a long weekend (Mexico celebrates their Constitution Day in early February, and we had the day off school yesterday).
I walked in the school office this morning, greeted a few teachers, and quickly set to work trying to plan out my day, as well as finish my weekly plans, which were due on Friday. After getting the minimum amount accomplished, I grabbed a portable stereo (for the listening portion of my classes) from a cabinet, and headed out the door toward my 8:20 4th grade class.
I walked halfway there before realizing that the little electronic adaptor at the end of the stereo’s plug was missing. I therefore retraced my steps all the way to the office, found the adaptor, reconnected it, and walked to the 4th grade classroom, now slightly late to class.
When my little 4th graders were finishing up their workbook assignment, the clock approached, then passed 9:10, the starting time for my next class, and the homeroom teacher still hadn’t arrived back from her break. I can’t leave the class until she gets back, so I was stuck waiting until 9:18, until she finally returned.
I booked it to my 9th grade class, got things somewhat organized, and began teaching. After finishing two/thirds of my class plan, I realized that I had ran out of time to do all that I wanted to, so I let them go to recess and I walked upstairs to meet my 10th graders, whose class actually went pretty well.
Recess allowed me to chomp down some granola and yogurt, get myself configured for my 11:30 12th grade Philosophy class, which I was pretty excited about. I recently re-watched The Matrix, and was inspired to use the film as an illustration of our knowledge of reality. I was pumped about using this cool medium to convey philosophical concepts to my students. As we began viewing the movie clips in class, one of the other teachers knocked on the classroom door and announced that some university representatives were wanting to use my class to give a presentation about their university to these high school seniors. With a polite smile on my face but a “You’ve got to be kidding me” thought in my heart, I consented. I shut down the movie and left the reps to do their thing.
12:20 brought my other 4th grade class to bear on my nerves. They’re beautiful little children, but I’m still trying to teach them the value of speaking one at a time. I came back to the office, tired and feeling defeated in not being able to control my students.
One of my good friends here invited me, David, and a few other folks to his house to eat. It was one of the girls’ birthdays, and the whole group was really enjoying the time together, joking around and acting ridiculous, as good friends do when there’s no inhibitions on being themselves. But my attitude was far from merry. I was tired and didn’t feel like talking or joking around – my sense of humor had long since gone. I enjoyed being with them, though. The lighthearted atmosphere gave lift to my spirit. However, I have two extra English classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so I had to leave the dinner early.
And here I am, sitting on my living room couch, having returned from my two extra classes, which I’m not convinced are doing a whole lot of good to help these kids learn English.
You’re probably wondering, “Why the heck did he just write all about his semi-depressing, ho-hum, I’m-not-making-a-difference day?” Good question.
Ever since I read the book of Ecclesiastes in one sitting a few days ago, I’ve been thinking about the meaning of life. Ol’ Solomon seems to think that our whole life is one big cycle, void of meaning, and that the only good thing for us to do is to work hard and enjoy whatever gifts God gives us. The Gospel of John has been bringing a little balance to these melancholic thoughts, but simultaneously adding more confusion by persistently bending my wandering sight toward a Rabbi from Nazareth who made lame men walk, turned water into wine, and told people that they only way to eternal life is by eating his flesh and drinking his blood.
These two pieces of Scripture are being connected in my heart and mind by the grace of the Almighty through the idea of worship, strangely enough. In Piper’s Desiring God, I’ve been reading that worship is an act of the “religious affections” (Piper quotes Jonathan Edwards in this), which are awoken through the vision of the reality of God, revealed in Jesus Christ. Apart from this, worship is a meaningless ritual – a cycle void of purpose and life. Worship is the true emotion of treasuring Jesus Christ as an end in himself.
It might be easy for me to see through the eyes of Solomon today: well, it's one more day in the cycle of good, bad, good, bad. It's all a cycle under the sun, right? But something within me longs for a different answer: something past the sun, something greater than its light. A Light beyond the sun.
Yeah, my day was a blah sort of day. We all have those. Yet I want the reality and light of God, as revealed through Jesus Christ, to stir up in me a true affection for him in worship, regardless of the circumstances. He is the greatest good – there is nothing beyond him.
Let us sink deeper into his reality and lose sight of our own, which passes through this time and space at the lightning speed of insignificance.
That frustrated little grumble pretty much sums up my day. I started Tuesday, February 5th slightly irked at my inability to accomplish very much this weekend, even though it was a long weekend (Mexico celebrates their Constitution Day in early February, and we had the day off school yesterday).
I walked in the school office this morning, greeted a few teachers, and quickly set to work trying to plan out my day, as well as finish my weekly plans, which were due on Friday. After getting the minimum amount accomplished, I grabbed a portable stereo (for the listening portion of my classes) from a cabinet, and headed out the door toward my 8:20 4th grade class.
I walked halfway there before realizing that the little electronic adaptor at the end of the stereo’s plug was missing. I therefore retraced my steps all the way to the office, found the adaptor, reconnected it, and walked to the 4th grade classroom, now slightly late to class.
When my little 4th graders were finishing up their workbook assignment, the clock approached, then passed 9:10, the starting time for my next class, and the homeroom teacher still hadn’t arrived back from her break. I can’t leave the class until she gets back, so I was stuck waiting until 9:18, until she finally returned.
I booked it to my 9th grade class, got things somewhat organized, and began teaching. After finishing two/thirds of my class plan, I realized that I had ran out of time to do all that I wanted to, so I let them go to recess and I walked upstairs to meet my 10th graders, whose class actually went pretty well.
Recess allowed me to chomp down some granola and yogurt, get myself configured for my 11:30 12th grade Philosophy class, which I was pretty excited about. I recently re-watched The Matrix, and was inspired to use the film as an illustration of our knowledge of reality. I was pumped about using this cool medium to convey philosophical concepts to my students. As we began viewing the movie clips in class, one of the other teachers knocked on the classroom door and announced that some university representatives were wanting to use my class to give a presentation about their university to these high school seniors. With a polite smile on my face but a “You’ve got to be kidding me” thought in my heart, I consented. I shut down the movie and left the reps to do their thing.
12:20 brought my other 4th grade class to bear on my nerves. They’re beautiful little children, but I’m still trying to teach them the value of speaking one at a time. I came back to the office, tired and feeling defeated in not being able to control my students.
One of my good friends here invited me, David, and a few other folks to his house to eat. It was one of the girls’ birthdays, and the whole group was really enjoying the time together, joking around and acting ridiculous, as good friends do when there’s no inhibitions on being themselves. But my attitude was far from merry. I was tired and didn’t feel like talking or joking around – my sense of humor had long since gone. I enjoyed being with them, though. The lighthearted atmosphere gave lift to my spirit. However, I have two extra English classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so I had to leave the dinner early.
And here I am, sitting on my living room couch, having returned from my two extra classes, which I’m not convinced are doing a whole lot of good to help these kids learn English.
You’re probably wondering, “Why the heck did he just write all about his semi-depressing, ho-hum, I’m-not-making-a-difference day?” Good question.
Ever since I read the book of Ecclesiastes in one sitting a few days ago, I’ve been thinking about the meaning of life. Ol’ Solomon seems to think that our whole life is one big cycle, void of meaning, and that the only good thing for us to do is to work hard and enjoy whatever gifts God gives us. The Gospel of John has been bringing a little balance to these melancholic thoughts, but simultaneously adding more confusion by persistently bending my wandering sight toward a Rabbi from Nazareth who made lame men walk, turned water into wine, and told people that they only way to eternal life is by eating his flesh and drinking his blood.
These two pieces of Scripture are being connected in my heart and mind by the grace of the Almighty through the idea of worship, strangely enough. In Piper’s Desiring God, I’ve been reading that worship is an act of the “religious affections” (Piper quotes Jonathan Edwards in this), which are awoken through the vision of the reality of God, revealed in Jesus Christ. Apart from this, worship is a meaningless ritual – a cycle void of purpose and life. Worship is the true emotion of treasuring Jesus Christ as an end in himself.
It might be easy for me to see through the eyes of Solomon today: well, it's one more day in the cycle of good, bad, good, bad. It's all a cycle under the sun, right? But something within me longs for a different answer: something past the sun, something greater than its light. A Light beyond the sun.
Yeah, my day was a blah sort of day. We all have those. Yet I want the reality and light of God, as revealed through Jesus Christ, to stir up in me a true affection for him in worship, regardless of the circumstances. He is the greatest good – there is nothing beyond him.
Let us sink deeper into his reality and lose sight of our own, which passes through this time and space at the lightning speed of insignificance.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
i'm still here
Faithful readers, I apologize for the absolute silence the past few weeks. Things have been rather ridiculous here in the beautiful pueblito of Parral, Chihuahua. My good friend David spent the week away from school all last week, and I helped cover some of his classes (those which began at 7:30 in the morning: ouch!). On top of that, high school classes began last week, which added another nine hours of teaching to my schedule. Needless to say, after teaching 6 classes in a row, 3 days in a row, I was bushed!
I don't have a whole lot of time to tantalize your minds with creative and profound thoughts, which I always feel the pressure to do as I publish my thoughts on the Web. But, I would like to briefly relate to you what a good work God continues to do in me, softening up my heart and mind.
Lately, I've been reading a book by John Piper entitled Desiring God. I highly recommend it as a profound read. I have been challenged to look at life through different lenses as I read this book. The main thrust of the book is to expose the glory of God and point to it as our true human desire: to know God and be with him, which is the greatest pleasure of all pleasures. He uses the parable of a man finding an invaluable treasure in a field and then going to sell all his possessions in order to buy the field, in order to obtain the treasure. As created beings, our greatest possible pleasure is to know and enjoy our Creator. Piper contends that the whole point of life is to become a Christian Hedonist: addicted to the pursuit of true pleasure, which is found in no other place save God alone.
Being in the Gospel of John at the same time has made me very conscious of this theme which weaves in and out of the fullness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. In the grace and truth of Christ is revealed the exact image of the Father, in whose fellowship the Son took the fullest pleasure. And through the ridiculous mercy of God, he has ushered unworthy, filthy rebels into the midst of that fellowship, into the midst of the purest pleasure that can ever be experienced. And if this is the case, why the heck am I not reveling in it?
May you experience the fullness of the pleasures found at the right hand of the Father (Psalm 16--read it before you go to bed tonight and chew on it for a while).
I don't have a whole lot of time to tantalize your minds with creative and profound thoughts, which I always feel the pressure to do as I publish my thoughts on the Web. But, I would like to briefly relate to you what a good work God continues to do in me, softening up my heart and mind.
Lately, I've been reading a book by John Piper entitled Desiring God. I highly recommend it as a profound read. I have been challenged to look at life through different lenses as I read this book. The main thrust of the book is to expose the glory of God and point to it as our true human desire: to know God and be with him, which is the greatest pleasure of all pleasures. He uses the parable of a man finding an invaluable treasure in a field and then going to sell all his possessions in order to buy the field, in order to obtain the treasure. As created beings, our greatest possible pleasure is to know and enjoy our Creator. Piper contends that the whole point of life is to become a Christian Hedonist: addicted to the pursuit of true pleasure, which is found in no other place save God alone.
Being in the Gospel of John at the same time has made me very conscious of this theme which weaves in and out of the fullness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. In the grace and truth of Christ is revealed the exact image of the Father, in whose fellowship the Son took the fullest pleasure. And through the ridiculous mercy of God, he has ushered unworthy, filthy rebels into the midst of that fellowship, into the midst of the purest pleasure that can ever be experienced. And if this is the case, why the heck am I not reveling in it?
May you experience the fullness of the pleasures found at the right hand of the Father (Psalm 16--read it before you go to bed tonight and chew on it for a while).
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